Nonna Dem Can Stoppa Da Times

All is well in NBHQ, roses still smell like boo boo, and holy mother of moses Randy is now a confirmed Jew! Mozzle Taf! It was a mighty event I must say, got to see my main mayonaise RUFF (hes in the middle), its been so long since any of us have seen that peanut head of his. Bia is RIPPED now, gained like 25 pounds of pure man meat, pretty crazy, but I guess thats what 7,000 pushups a night does to ya boobies. Crazy nonetheless. G’times though, got my mingle on. Yesm.

When all was said and confirmed, my dad couldn’t wait to finally strip off his clothes and exhale, and I was horrified to see THIS. Scary shiznit son, who knows what kinda fetus he could be harboring in therrr.

Yeah so that was my Sunday. Today Giovanni made a NBHQ salute, Giovanni style, whatever floats your goat man.

Be sure to visit the site tommorow for the epic tale of Matt Eberts gnarly radical bodacious car crash!

Oh… and am I the man? DUHRRRRRR

Fantasticly Well Friday

Sugahless class, sit on my ass, rigerous rhymes, tangy green limes, splinter shouts taquilla, now I can barely see ya, kissin the floor, drinkin sommore, now where oh where is my dear lenore?

Miss Harbison and I hadta hit up the softball grudge game to show our support, and to make fun of the shitsdale knights. I guess we got their minutes after there was a pretty descent fight, cops and all ( Mateos Finest). Game was good I think, that Amanda Ryder, gets the MVP in my book, g’damn girl can play. Ally was there, not too sure if she knew what was goin on, sall bueno, cause, g’damn, girls knows how to whirl some pom poms, and I dont mean during the game…JUSSSSSS KIDDDINGGGGG Kinda hard to cheer anyway when it was so damn nipply at the time, even my brotha dawkness was feelin the bumps of the goose. Cahill was there tambien, I think he was wearin shorts too, im not sure if his testicles have returned to normal size yet but I will keep everyone informed on his progress. Miss Talbot was there too, prolly cold as shit too, youd think we could get a few warm nights here in Cali Ali, but nopes, were all equipped with nipples that could carve a fucking statue. Yeh whateva.

So from therr, me Eebs, Miss Molly, Dawkness, and some other people? Headed to the house of Shells fer some good times. Shelly wasn’t having the best of times given the circumstances, luckily we had the Eebs to turn that frown upside down with the power of MUSIC, it was a touching moment to say the least. Speaking of touching, how would you like to put your hands on my very own intoxicating concoction that I christened the SAD/HAPPY, indeed, damn good, had like..ice…hoggin the daws ice cream (vanilla), umm what else..? oh those bottled crapachinos that are like 5 bucks a piece, and oh yeh, VANILLA SMIRNOFF, makes ya wanna yick yer yips eh? Yeah you know it hoe.

But thats not all, thats not all, we also had plenty of alcohol, and we hid, Leo Tripped, Leo Rocked and Shells was so high up on the counter.

Bittle Lit B-Z

Alo Superfreaks, freaky geeks, and kinky creeps, you know I’m busy, you hella know it. Not much to report though, I like posting when I got pics to put up herr, but you find me now picless. Damn im tired, not so wired, seemingly inspired. Wull I tend to talk about myself a lot on here, I say we talk about you. The mo puckin PEOPLE of NBHQ.

Talkin bout my boy Randy:

Randy’s my dog, the robin, and the michaelanjelo (when we played ninja turtles). Hes havin his Jewish confirmation soon, and he invited me to go, you know im goin, Randy’s my best friend, known em since preschool, pretty proud of em. Case ya dint know, Im no chia pet, if I had anymore hops I could touch my head on my ceiling when I jump, and easily demolish your scale. Randy on the other hand, is the fucking wall. When we were in preschool I was bigger than him, up until like sixth grade I was way bigger than em. Now hes like maxin out at like 270 (pounds) and flippin freshman upside down for lunch money, g’dam I’m so prouda that guy. Me and Randy meng.

Talkin bout my brotha dawkness:

Known my main mayonaise Leo for some time now, he be cold as ice, and he be lovin the rice. Only homie I know who doesn’t enjoy “his own brand,” kinda weird, but whatever, I dont like his brand either. If it were packaged it’d be like Shitsmellin-albaro’s or shitports. Yaya whatever, you my boy dawkness, you my boy. My brotha dawkness

Talkin bout Shahh-Rahhh Shell Fish:

Shell Fish is the girl for the fellas, shes really nice, the kind you take home to mutha, she aint no supa freak, she on the prowl along with Bobs, cause the guy she was with was a total dick anda half and hes a retarded ogre who gives all of us over 6 feet tall a bad rap. Were not all so bad Shell Fish. Yeah so if you want some Shell Fish for dinner, best hit er up online, get her screen name and directions to her house from me, she keeps the key under the welcome mat, but ya dint hear it from me, stalkers welcome.

Talkin bout the rest of the NBHQ’ers:

Thanks for still comin here, thanks for puttin up with the busyness, thanks for sayin bia…Bia

Heres your inspiration to comment:

Foo Foo in the Wah Wah

Eebs, Ash’ms, Moll Moll, Shell Fish, and Ally came by, we swam in my warm dirty pool, played the foo ball. Let it be forever known that Ashley suggested we play spin the bottle…in the pool..wull, what she lacks in ingenuity she makes up for in Italian-ness, and thats all bueno in my book. Also, let it be known that me and Ash’ms, AKA “Team Italy” spanked the bajeebus outta Eebs and Molly, straight savness italiano/italiana ness goin down. No pics of the match but you’ll jus hafta take my word that we came, we saw, we conquered, in the name of Mussolini. mmm hmmm

Not wantin to go to school tommorow, but I will, havent missed a day in weeks, many many weeks, I think ill go tommorow too, jus to be cool.

Did ya notice the mothers day card I made for my momma? Whatja think? Kinda mean that I dint even tell her I did anything for her till late in the day, I guess thats why my mom stopped at one kid :P. Wull, comment and wish my mom a happy mothers day, she has a lot to put up with.

Oh and I lied about not takin any pics, someone left their sweater here, at first I thought it was Eebs cause it smells like his perfume, but…hmm, im having doubts. Put it on fora test drive, and for some reason, the girls medium doesn’t fit me! I was agast. Think Imma keep it anyway though, so thanks :D.